who knows

by Violet

For a while, but only recently I thought I was incapable of love.

I second-guessed all the ties I have had before.. before her.

why?

Well this girl I’ve only encountered a few countable times, yet I’ve known her my whole life; or so it feels when I’m in her undoubtable presence.

Her presence..

it is nothing but awkward for me, or one could say heart shattering even; I want her to hold my hand and greet me, the real me, back, yet she never does. She looks at me with cold eyes and that sweet pout of hers.. and every time we lock eyes it is like the first time for her.. and my last. It ruins me, each and every time.

But that night she came over it felt like the sweet little, devious lying dream it always has been.

only below her touch there I was realising how surreal it all feels.

her kisses, strokes and breaths ..

I was hers since day one; more-sadly-so I even repeated it to her time after time but she just chose to never listen. to any of my screaming and pleading.. deaf to my overwhelming love.

 I wrote words, played songs and kissed her with my aching heart.. and still.. nothing.

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